We all need others to move through life…
This one is for the moms:
It is not your job to do it all and to do it all "right" (whatever that means).
We all need others to move through life.
I always use that classic motto "Team work makes the dream work!"
That means it is perfectly normal to lean on our family, friends, and others for support.
This is your "community"!
Those who care about us, do want to help! It is not a burden....
These suggestions are about some reasons why it is important for you to take time for yourself, as well as delegate some "jobs or chores" to others (including your children as they get older).
*Side note: kids need you to give them some responsibilities so that they may feel like they are "needed", so that they develop some life long basic living skills, and so that they feel confident in their own abilities to complete tasks.
Why is it good for you?
Potential to improve your mental and physical health
Brings order to your space which is something your brain loves
Reduces resentment that can build up over time if you don't feel appreciated or valued
Potential to improve your relationships with your children and spouse/partner
How does that look in practice, when you have children? Where to start?
First, plan to spend time in your home space alone. This is a gift to you, your spouse/partner and your children. I have always enjoyed being in my "nest" by myself. It brings me peace and comfort. Perhaps it will do the same for you
Find a spouse/partner, friend, babysitter or family member that can commit to watching your children for at least two hour once a month or once a week. Someone who can take your kids out of your home.
Spend the two hours - decluttering (we all have decluttering to do), organizing / arranging (homing or rehoming items that you are keeping).
As time goes by, continue with the routine of them taking the kids out for two hours. Your space will become quicker to declutter/ rehome and you will have time to sit and read, have a cup of tea, work on a craft that you've been putting off, or do whatever you wish to do in your "safe, comfortable space" by yourself. Only restriction: NO SHOPPING.
*Side note: Our homes should be a place of rest, not stress. Once you create your functional home space, perhaps you will recognize the value in maintaining it. You'll never want to give up your two hour alone at home-time.
Finally, embrace "good enough" and give yourself some grace. Life is complicated and at times feels hard, but with the support of your "community" you can navigate through it.